I knew having a baby would be life-altering, but whew. These baby days are rough.
Arthur Scott made his world debut on April 18th – he’s three months today. And I say he made his debut, but really we forced his hand. Once he’d stuck around an extra 11 days, the doctor induced me on the 17th at 8:00 A.M…. and about 30 hours later we landed in surgery to physically remove the baby that would not come out. Stubborn at the first, huh Arthur? Let’s hope this isn’t a sign.
I kind of figured we’d have it a little more together by now, three months in. But no one told me that you have to teach your child to sleep… or that it really doesn’t work too well until they are a few months old. Or that babies eat every 2-3 hours… for months, not just at first. I don’t think anyone ever told me that itty-bitty babies take four naps a day, either. That they are just not as portable as people make them out to be.
I knew that having a baby really alters your schedule, but I kind of thought it got better sooner than this.
Needless to say, I’ve not written six consecutive sentences since he’s been born, and I’ve only really picked up my camera in the last two or three weeks. I’m starting to feel like a human again, to get out of the house once in a while, with and without Arthur. I’m learning which cries are hungry cries and which ones are “I should have napped longer” cries, how to entertain him for the tiny windows of time he is awake and alert and not physically attached to me nursing.
He likes baths, thank goodness. He wants to see the world, which is marvelous. He’s slowly figuring out that our two cats exist and that they move. He often decides that sleep is overrated and then we all regret it later.
So he’s a pretty normal baby, from what I gather.
I’ve never spent so much time invested in the research and deliberation of when and how to get another person to go to and stay asleep. I’ve never done so much math in my life.
And, of course, I’ve never loved anyone so instantly.
While we’re adjusting, I’m trying hard not to be frustrated when there’s setbacks. But that’s a tough line for this over-analyzer to follow. I’m trying to spend time with other moms to remind myself that all of this is normal, that it is a season, that we will get through it. I’m listening to good podcasts, recent episodes of Chasing Creative where we’ve interviewed moms, and trying to minimize the amount of battery operated toys that enter through my front door.
And I’m slowly adding back in things that bring me joy. I’m working a little, taking a few more pictures, reading a few more books (e-readers are a gift to moms everywhere), and recognizing that drive-thrus were created for the parents of small children.
A day at a time, if my planner-at-heart self can manage it.
If you have kids, what new-baby things were you shocked to learn with your first? Any tips for entertaining a 3-month old or getting him to like naps?
P.S. I share things over at Instagram a little more often than here on the blog these days.
Valerie Biel says
He is so adorable! I know he probably isn’t when he’s not sleeping and you need to sleep, but seriously — can he get any cuter?? Our kids weren’t great sleepers at first. It gets better slowly. I was kind of horrified by a lot of things as a new mom. Um — okay labor — ouch!! They make those inflatable donuts to sit on for a reason. The sleep thing is universally awful. I made some enormous promises to our son to get him to go to sleep–as in “I’ll buy you a ________ when you’re _______. Please just sleep for Mommy!” And the damn squeaky floorboard I stepped on EVERY SINGLE TIME I tried to tip toe out of the room after putting kids into the crib. And the poop — vast quantities of poop. Up the back — I think I’m going to throw up — amounts of poop. And breastfeeding . . . oh-so-many-things I could say about breastfeeding. I just remember looking down at my chest and thinking that this IS NOT my body when my milk came in. Okay, that’s way too much information, but Moms have to share this stuff just to help other Moms know they aren’t crazy! Glad you’re getting back to doing some things you enjoy!
Sarah Davidson says
Rad Parenting is also another great podcast!
Anouk says
The first 8 weeks were the hardest for me. Then after that, every age/stage was better than the last. Two years old was my ultimate favorite so far, although I am enjoying the 3 and 6 year old stage now. Thanks for sharing . . . and I love how my baby boy’s newborn session was one of the “related” posts at the bottom of this one. Loved reliving it through your post, but glad I’m not reliving the newborn stage in real life :)
Cassie says
Great post! I’m so glad he has your adventurous spirit. ❤️
Jane says
I am happy to see you are doing this blog. There’s no way to be the perfect mommy, but a million ways to be a good one. I believe that is you. A good mommy, teaching Arthur about love and he is teaching you about a love that you never new existed, that is what matters. God picked you to be his mommy because you’re just what little Arthur needs. However, there are those days that it seems everything is upside down. Are you sure you’re holding your phone right-side up? :-) One step back, two steps forward, see you’re a step ahead. ;-)
Steve Shoemaker says
I love the photo of him laughing. We also have a new baby in the house. My 22 year old boomerang, Monica, aka Lizzy, had a beautiful baby boy on June 25th. So, all of these things are fresh and new in my world, too. Again.